Dukh Daroo Sukh Rog Bhaya

Dukh daaru sukh rog bhaiya jaa sukh taami na hoyee: Pain is the medicine and pleasure is the disease; and where there is pleasure, there is no desire for God (sggs 469).

when i recite these words every evening, i get tears in my eyes, my throat gets tight... i know the words by heart, but i can't seem to make them sink in. there's so much pain in my life, both physical and emotional. i know that it makes me stronger. i understand that this pain draws me closer to Waheguru. but this is an intellectual understanding. in my heart, i still find myself asking, "why?"

Sukh kayu maangai sabh ko dukh na mangai koyi. Sukhai kaou dukh agalaa manmukh boojh na hoi: Every one craves for happiness and none asks for misery. But in the wake of happiness, there comes great suffering. The self-willed Manmukhs do not understand this (sggs 57).

on my path to become Gurmukh (Guru + Mukh or "face". one who faces the Guru), i struggle to understand, not just in my mind, but in my heart, that there is no difference between Sukh and Dukh, happiness and pain.

Sukh dukh dono sam kari jaanai aour maanu apamaanaa. Harakh sog te rahai ateetaa tini jagi tatu pashaanaa. Usatat nindaa do-oo tiaagai khojai padu nirabaanaa. Jan Nanak ihu khel kathan hai kinahoon gurmukhi jaanaa: One who knows that pain and pleasure are both the same, and honor and dishonor as well; who remains detached from joy and sorrow, realizes the true essence in the world. Renounce both praise and blame; seek instead the state of Nirvaanaa. O servant Nanak, this is such a difficult game; only a few Gurmukhs (who have become Spiritual beings) understand it! (sggs 218).

as with all manmukhs, my Man (mind) is my main obstacle. i need to go past my mind, past my need for logic, and turn my face to Guru. easier said than done, especially for one as absorbed in intellectual pursuits as me. :) i was raised to think for myself. to gather information, analyze, and make my own decisions. to let go of all this and rely on Guru is difficult for anyone, and possibly more difficult for me. while i can agree with Guru in my Man, until i let him control my heart, i cannot be Gurmukh, and i cannot escape Dukh.

fortunately for us, Guru has given many options for attaining happiness. one method that intrigues me is to look at the world through the eyes of a child...

Paayo baal budh sukh re: Adopting the innocent mind of a child, I have found Inner Peace (sggs 510)

i think it's time for some internal regression. like most adults, i've become cynical, suspicious, in other words, the exact opposite of childlike innocence. it's time to dig deep, to recapture that feeling, to open my child's eyes and see the world in a different way.

with Gurprasad (Guru's grace), i will find that innocent mind inside me.